Coaching - The Role of a Divorce Coach

• Where is it you’re stuck?
• What might you do to move yourself forward?
• What else do you need to do?

Divorce coaches work either face to face with clients or over the telephone and have different styles – some are life or mentor coaches and consultants; others have therapeutic expertise and training. Clients are normally struggling or stuck; they may have appointed a lawyer or they may not have started the legal process.

How does divorce coaching help the client?

• By challenging the client – this is especially helpful if they are avoiding doing what it takes to help them move on.
• By motivating them - as role models who have survived and thrived themselves through divorce.
• In supporting them – especially emotionally.
• By just listening. This is especially useful if they don’t have friends to talk to who have themselves been through it, or if they wish to keep their friends.

The client may need to see what the options are to progress to the next stage. They choose those which are realistic and will work on them between coaching sessions, reporting progress at the next session, or by e-mail. By looking at the realistic options available and agreeing a plan which is regularly assessed and updated, the client always takes responsibility for the action and can see real progress being made.

How does the client take responsibility? They are given the right tools to navigate a path through the divorce minefield. Depending on the coach, this may involve a combination of:

Practical support – firstly, by finding clarity in the options available in separation and divorce and then finding answers to the multiple queries and concerns which are part and parcel of divorce.

Financial tools – assistance if required in finding good financial advice to calculate net worth, expenditure and investment requirements.

Legal support – assistance if required in finding good legal advice appropriate to their situation and at sensible cost, according to their financial worth.

Emotional tools - to overcome fear, to encourage communication and to find the courage to make change.

Children support - helping parents help their children through this difficult time by gaining a better understanding of their feelings and the possible impact of parents’ negative behaviour on the children.
Who are divorce coach clients?
Our clients are male and female in the UK, married and co-habiting. Not all our clients are parting - some may be considering the possibility, others working towards reconciling.

For those who have a lawyer, using a divorce coach frees up the solicitor from the emotional and practical side leaving them to focus on the legal side of the case.
Anyone struggling with their relationship and needing clarity (which is not legal advice) or simply needing help to find the courage to make changes would benefit from talking to a divorce coach.

How Divorce Coaches can help post divorce
You are divorced and effectively single again. Where do you go from here? A divorce coach will help people to develop their full potential and empower them to:

• Develop a positive attitude
• Increase your confidence and self-esteem
• Identify negative emotions and limiting beliefs that are holding you back
• Clarify your goals (what you want to be, do or have) for your new life
• Focus on the steps you need to take to achieve your goals.

The author
Kirsten Gronning supports people who are facing or going through serious relationship breakdown, helping them to find a balance between the divorce process and getting on with life. Based in Richmond Surrey, Kirsten is herself divorced and the mother of three teenage children. Receive your free copy of Kirsten's guide ‘Simple Steps to save serious Money in Divorce’ by subscribing on the Divorce Coach website www.divorcecoaching.co.uk